


I Never Forgot

by AiShi



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: 3am writings, Alternate Universe - Reincarnation, Angst and Feels, Because of course he has, Hurt No Comfort, Letters, Levi (Shingeki no Kyojin) Has Feelings, M/M, Minor Spoilers, One Shot, POV Levi (Shingeki no Kyojin), Response letter, my shortest work so far
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-13
Updated: 2019-06-13
Packaged: 2020-05-02 05:53:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 968
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19193053
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AiShi/pseuds/AiShi
Summary: After reading Eren's letter, Levi couldn't help recounting his own perspective through the use of a pen.———A response version of TaxiDamask's one-shot.





	I Never Forgot

**Author's Note:**

  * Translation into Français available: [I Never Forgot](https://archiveofourown.org/works/19726483) by [roseroro](https://archiveofourown.org/users/roseroro/pseuds/roseroro)
  * Inspired by [I Remember](https://archiveofourown.org/works/19123102) by [TaxiDamask](https://archiveofourown.org/users/TaxiDamask/pseuds/TaxiDamask). 



> This is kinda new to me since this is like a sequel to a story I didn't write in the first place.
> 
> This is my own (Levi's) version of the one-shot, and I'm really sorry if I ever shifted the general perception of the original one.

Eren,

Lifetimes and multiple civilization progresses later, and you're still writing me these goddamn letters. I never forgot the first time I found your note on my desk, telling me you've cleaned my quarters spotless so I should take a break, and the multiple instances that followed after that. I loved reading them, nonetheless, it had been a difficult time and papers did need to be rationed. You shouldn't have wasted them on me.

I never forgot that time when your name would always be the first one to pop out on my chatbox everytime I login. It seemed like you were always waiting for me. We could talk endlessly about whatever shit you wanted to discuss. You were always the first one to initiate things. Always. It was fine for a while until the nightmares came crashing in. So I stopped responding. I never should've in the first place.

I never forgot that time you came into my company to apply for a job. You still held the same fire in those eyes, and I knew I was going to get burned. You spilled my tea, fucked-up my schedules. The same old brat all those lifetimes ago. And as shocking as this may come out, it hurt. It hurt to see the same kid following me around like a puppy. You never listened when I would outrightly push you away. So I went for a subtle route. Those flowers you sent me for Valentine's? I was that trash can. Hell, that trash deserved it more than I did.

I never forgot that time of working with you in the same hospital. I thought it wouldn't be as bad, seeing as your department was far from mine. It was. You kept giving me coffee cups I didn't deserve. And seeing you were still that determined trooper the first time – in the first lifetime we've ever met, it just made it ache all the more.

I never forgot meeting your father for the first time ever in the flower shop I was working at. I knew he could only be your father since I saw your eyes in his. Funny how it was in a time when he had sidepieces just when you thought you could keep both your parents alive. They were. But your family wasn't. I wasn't surprised anymore when you showed up eventually. I couldn't even find it in me to defend myself after you blamed me for all the shit your father did. I deserved that. For a whole lot of other reasons.

I never forgot that time I saw your face in my class. The way you left notes in your papers awfully reminded me of that time behind the walls. I was seeing you again as often as I did back then. I was once again that captain who kept finding random notes around his office. It was torture. It was horrible. You were horrible. How could you do that to me again?

And fuck Eren, I would never forget that time I thought getting married to another person would be the solution to break free from this goddamn cycle we kept finding ourselves in. The very moment my husband mentioned your name, I knew I fucked-up more than I already had. I could feel your eyes on me the entire time. Those eyes I've always adored but couldn't even look at anymore. You said you cried so hard in bed after the wedding night, I did in the shower.

Lifetime after lifetime and our paths just kept crossing. Lifetime after lifetime you kept chasing after me. Lifetime after lifetime I kept pushing you away. You're a determined brat, Eren. But I'm a stubborn asshole.

Zeke couldn't kill me back then. And I never fulfilled my own promise of killing him. But you, Eren. Fuck, I would never forget what I've done with my own hands. You seemed like an entirely different person when you came back from Marley. You looked different. You acted different. But deep down, you were always that 15-year-old brat I've always known. Lifetime after lifetime of meeting you over and over is more than enough of a testament.

How could I forget how you've died by my own hands? How could I forget how you smiled at me despite what I did? How could I forget how you said you loved me before taking your last breath? You never resented me, Eren. You should have. As much as I resent myself.

You deserve so much more, Eren. I noticed how you've stopped chasing after me. How could I not? As much as it kills me, this is how it should be. I could never be the person you thought I was. I've never been. I don't deserve the pedestal you've put me on, so take my place instead.

I've always adored you, Eren. So much it hurts. Seeing your face in each lifetime just sends the nightmares rushing in everytime. In each lifetime I tried to see if I could make a relationship work. I couldn't. I don't want to risk you.

Our life had been nothing but a cycle. You've loved me on our first lifetime, and you've always had lifetimes after that. I was the reason for your demise on our first lifetime, and I would never want a repeat lifetimes after that.

I always remember you, Eren. But more importantly, I always remember what I did to you. How could I ever forget?

Levi

 

* * *

 

It took a few more moments for Levi to start moving again after his pen stopped at the end. It was hard to see with all the tears blocking his vision.

But instead of sending the letter to its rightful receiver, Levi ended up throwing it straight into the trash can.

**Author's Note:**

> I've written this at 3AM. So, you know... just to put an excuse out there.
> 
> I've always been a silent reader, but my mind kept racing as I've read the one-shot, so I thought maybe I could just vomit the words out instead.
> 
> If you haven't read the original work, go check it out. And please note this is just my version of the story and may not be the way the author of the other fic intended it to.


End file.
